You have an inner critic. You will never get rid of it. Instead of fighting it the best plan is to befriend it. Your inner critic wants to keep you safe in the limitations of your ego. As a child, … Continue reading
When you were young your ego kept you safe. It helped you to become your own person differentiating yourself from others. It prevented you from making choices that could hurt you.
Your ego helped you to deal with the messiness of life. It was like a parent for you especially if your parents were not present or helpful.
The positive intent of your inner critic is to keep you safe. It is that part of your ego which exists to keep you under its influence. As I said above, the ego played an important role in helping you to survive your childhood. You would not have survived without it.
When you grow into adulthood the ego and the inner critic can get in your way if you are not aware of how it is impacting your life. Continue reading
How you and your business make decisions has a huge impact on the well-being of management and staff. Choices that show the company cares about their employees and families make a huge difference in the retention of employees and increased … Continue reading
If you are seventy plus, you bring a lot of life experience with you. As time goes by, you have hopefully learned to change what you can control and let go of things you have no control over. You are … Continue reading
You spend a lot of time at work. Life is short so why don’t you make the best of your time. Being able to enjoy your connections with those you work with makes a world of difference. Here are some of the benefits of good relationships at work.
The Enneagram an Excellent Tool
The Enneagram personality system helps you to get along better with your colleagues. It helps you to get to know yourself and understand others better.
When you come into the world, you naturally are given one of nine different ways to survive in the world. Both your genetic background and early life experiences influence the personality type you receive.
When you know what type you are, you begin to understand why you act the way you do. It also gives you clues as to what makes others tick. All this makes it possible for healthier relationships with your self and others. For more information on the Enneagram, please see last weeks blog.
Good Relationships Make a Difference
There are many reasons to have good relationships at work:
Feelings of Well-Being:
1. Building relationships with your colleagues enhance your feelings of well-being. You feel supported not only in your paid work but in your general welfare as a human being. You no longer have to divide your self between your personal and work life. You can be yourself in both places.
The Enneagram personality system helps you to become more present allowing you to be fully open at the moment. When you are open, you are better able to create healthier boundaries. Healthy boundaries enable you to be fully present to another person without having to give up your own needs.
Communication Makes the World Go Around:
2. Excellent communication makes your business more productive. Your ability to communicate with others increases as you build healthy relationships with those at work. The best way to talk with a colleague is by being fully open to their body language, emotions and what they have to say.
Communication is enhanced through working with the Enneagram. When you can see how different you see the world as compared to others, it opens the door to better understanding.
As you get healthier in all nine types, you have an excellent communication toolbox to get your message across in the most helpful way.
So much can get in the way of your people understanding you. The Enneagram shows you the places you tend to get stuck.
You begin to see your blind spots such as overcompensating for your lack of worth by focussing more on the needs of others and/or overly criticizing others for not completing tasks in the exact way you wanted.
A company that uses the Enneagram with staff and management helps your organization to get along with each other. Learning the nine fundamental ways to function in the world helps to create self-awareness. This is the first step to excellent communication.
The Power of Collegiality:
3. Collegiality is fundamental for a company to be productive, not only for staff getting along with each other but in relationships with your customers and clients.
For collegial relationships to be active and healthy, you need to move beyond your personality. The Enneagram points out where you get stuck in your habits. The Enneagram provides you a map to get out of your box.
When you are open to your three energy centers, through, personal development, space opens up in your relationships. Creating space allows for bridges to be built across diverse views. You make this happen by sharing skills, being open about your abilities, and expressing your creativity.
Collegiality at its best is like a dance where everybody knows how to move with each other bringing out your best.
Unmask Your Creativity:
4. Creativity is a misunderstood word. How creative do you believe you are? You and everyone else has an artistic side. Did someone in your life try to silence your artistic side?
The Enneagram points to the creativity in you and everyone else. You are naturally creative when you are open to experiencing the world through our bodies, emotions and quiet mind.
When you have a group of people feeling good and enjoying the comradery of your colleagues, you will have a natural desire and ability to be creative.
You will no longer view the world as dualistic. Problems that seemed insurmountable, you will find a new way to move ahead. You and your colleagues will be free to try new ideas and retry old ideas that in another time didn’t work or given a chance.
You and your company are going to move ahead with greater confidence and ease.
Investing in Mental Health:
5. Your physical, mental and spiritual health are vital to you and your organization. More and more companies are encouraging their employees like you to stay active and fit through providing access to gyms, yoga classes and other forms of group exercise.
Your spiritual well-being is congruent with the worth you connect with the work you do. Doing work that goes against your values will destroy you. You want people in your places of work that believe what you are doing is essential and adds value to the world.
The Enneagram is a great tool to help you find balance in your life. It helps you to see what is missing in your life and what you overindulge. It not only helps you to name what is not, in balance but gives you clues to find balance again.
The Power of Conflict:
6. Do you like conflict? You are probably like many who do not enjoy conflict unless you are one of the few people who thrive on it.
Conflict is prevalent in your life. You have conflict soon as you have a group of people with different points of view. In your diverse world, it is reasonable and healthy to have a difference of opinion.
As the Enneagram welcomes you into a non-dualistic word, many more solutions open up, especially when there are more two ways to resolve a conflict.
The Enneagram helps you to look at each situation with fresh eyes to see what is the best solution for the time.
Resolving conflict becomes a win-win solution which is good news for everyone!
Efficiency Comes from Healthy Relationships:
7. All businesses want to have efficient works. You are going to be the most efficient when you enjoy the benefit of good relationships at work.
If you have a bully for a boss, you might be efficient for a short time because of fearing your boss. But this will not last because unhappy, stressed out workers become less and less productive.
Bullied employees will get sick more often. Bullied employees will take more days off work because of stress and illness. Bullied employees take no pride or responsibility in the operation of the business. You will continually look for new employees as staff continues to leave for better work environments.
The Enneagram can help you, and your colleagues find ways to honor, support and respect each other. It will help you bring out the best in yourself and the rest of the staff and management.
The benefits of good relationships at work are many. A happy, meaningful and respectful work environment encourages healthy relationships between you and your colleagues.
When you are getting your needs met, you are going to be more relaxed, committed, creative and hard working.
If you see the value of the work you put into your job, you will treat your post as much more than a task to make money. If you are passionate about what you do you are going to work with high energy and dedication.
With the experience of knowing that conflict is positive, you will experience diverse opinions as a strength more than a curse.
You will find freedom in fully expressing your opinions, thoughts, theories, and ideas to your organization knowing they will be heard. There is no longer need to pick only one winner. The team becomes more important than the individual.
Most of all, you will enjoy being with the people who work with you. Going to work will no longer be drudgery, but something you look forward to each day. Going to work becomes fun and empowering.
Roland Legge offers Life Coaching through REL Consultants for individuals, and Executives to help them to be the best they can be. For more information, please arrange for a free 30-minute discovery call by phoning Roland at 1 306 620-7478 or book your appointment online Please click on “Discovery Call.”
Originally Posted at REL Consultants http://www.relconsultants.com
Fed up with Your Job
Are you ready for a job change, but you are too fearful to try? Many of us are stuck in jobs we don’t enjoy. The good news is that we don’t need to stay in them.
Our minds are good at coming up with all sorts of excuses. For example, the money is good in my current job. My family is relying on me. I don’t know what I would do if I wasn’t doing my current job. I don’t want to go back to school. I am too old to start something new. I am afraid to fail. I should be thankful for what I have. Can you relate to any of these excuses?
The Beginning of a New Adventure
What would it take to get you exploring a new job or career? For me it was growing frustration with my current job and excitement about something new I was learning. It also helped to have friends and family who were encouraging me.
Career Planning Needs Imagination
In high school did you go through a computer program in Guidance Class to discover what you would be good at doing? When I did this none of their suggestions really appealed to me. The trouble was that the careers I was interested in were not on the list. To many of the things I wanted to do included skills and abilities I did not think I had. I now know this is a time to dream big!
Loving your Work
What do you love to do? Do you like interacting with people? Would you rather be working by yourself? Do you love to work with numbers? Are you good at organising? Do you like talking on the phone? Would you describe yourself as creative? Would you rather work for yourself? These are but a few of the questions you might want to think about.
What is Enough?
How much money do you need to do what you love? Here are a couple of questions to get you thinking. How important is it for you to travel? Are you a person that likes to stay close to home? If you live in a city do you need a car? Instead of buying books you could get them from the library. Do you really need all the latest gadgets to enjoy life?
What quality of life do you Want?
I have met few people who would say they have enough money. I think most of us think we could always use more. But how much money is enough for you. Maybe you would rather have more time off from work to enjoy time with loved ones.
What on earth should I Do?
You don’t know what you want to do? Go and take a course for credit or not, on a topic that interests you. Volunteer for an organization that excites you. Over time you will discover more interests and skills. You may be surprised to find a way to do something you love and make a living from it.
What is your Passion?
I got drawn to learn about the personality system called the Enneagram. Gradually this led me to a Life Coaching program that uses the Enneagram as one of its main tools to help people to discover the wisdom that is within them. At the beginning, I didn’t do this because I thought it would lead me to a new career.
Do it because you Love It
I did it because I loved what I was learning. I was so excited about what I was learning that I wanted to share it with others. Now I have left a job that no longer inspires me into something new that has reignited my passion for life.
Start small. Find a book on a topic that inspires you. Maybe this will lead you to taking a course. Find an organization or group who will support you in your learning. As you explore new possibilities you will build self confidence opening yourself up to new possibilities. You will know when you are ready to make the big leap.
Live knowing that you have something important to Offer the World
Life is too shore to spend a lot of time doing things you don’t enjoy or suck the life out of you. Take the risk to begin a new adventure in your life. It is never too late to begin. You will be rewarded in ways that you never expected.
Roland Legge offers coaching through REL Consultants for individuals, couples, families and executives to help them to be the best they can be. For more information please arrange for a free 30-minute discovery call by phoning Roland at 1 306 620-7478 or you can email Roland at email@example.com .
Exploring the Word:
Sermon – August 31st 2014
12th Sunday after Pentecost (Year A)
By Roland Legge
Imagine you are walking along and you notice a bush that is burning. But the strange thing is that the bush is not being consumed by the fire. Now that would get my attention, unless I was visiting Universal Studios in Hollywood.
When we read this passage from Exodus it is the burning bush that gets our attention. But what is really amazing, is who God calls to do his work! God calls Moses this less than perfect sinful person to do his/her work to free God’s people.
Moses was no saint. He killed an Egyptian man because he had hit one of his own people. He was part of God’s plan to kill many Egyptians to help free his people. Moses could get very angry. He was obstinate. I wouldn’t want to be around him when he was angry.
Neither was he thrilled by God’s plan for him to free their people from Egypt. He had many excuses, even though God wasn’t willing to hear his excuses. He was reluctant, at best, to agree to God’s call.
Moses was a complex man. While he did some very bad things God still trusted him to do what he needed him to do. God somehow new that Moses had what it was going to take the challenge the power of Pharaoh. Moses became a great leader helping his people to travel through the wilderness on the way to the Promised Land. He faced drought, rebellion and anger from his people because they were exhausted and frustrated. Because his intimate relationship with the Creator he and his people never gave up. Now that took a lot of courage, faith and commitment.
If God can find leaders in people like Moses God can find leaders in us. God doesn’t look for leaders like a big corporation would. God usually finds the least expected people to do her/his work. People like you and I.
God is looking for a very different qualities. God is calling for people who will follow their call even if it makes them to feel uncomfortable. God is looking for people to do the impossible such as overcoming violence and poverty. God is looking for people to see the goodness in all people. God is looking for people who are willing to lead through vulnerability, non-violence and unconditional love. God is looking for people who are not afraid to suffer to overcome hate, prejudice and retribution. God is looking for people who will offer change through invitation rather than coercion!
Today in churches like Foam Lake United we are being called to ministry whether or not we are the laity or clergy. . God is looking for lay and order of ministry people to see through the eyes of God and then to have the courage to respond to what they see that needs God’s attention. For example, we see people in our community who are sick, grieving the loss of a loved one and/or facing a personal emergency and we do help them with food, money and love. We hear every Sunday the amazing ministry, done in our name, through the work of the Mission and Service fund and we are compelled to give.
Today our congregation and all of Christendom is being asked to reach out to people in our communities, nation and world just as Jesus did when he lived. This means finding the courage to take the church and its ministry outside of our buildings. It means getting involved in the politics of our time helping to discern with our leaders the type of world our faith compels us create.
Sometimes it means that we need to risk getting the comfortable uncomfortable. I think the life and ministry of people like Martin Luther King best illustrates this. In a letter from Birmingham Jail Martin Luther King justifies why he has organized marches and sit-ins that have disturbed the peace. Martin Luther King is all for negotiation but he believes that sometimes nonviolent direct action is required to create a crisis to foster such a tension that a community which has constantly refused to negotiate is forced to confront the issue. It seeks so to dramatize the issue that it can no longer be ignored.
Pulpit Resource by William H. Willimon http://www.logosproductions.com/content/august-31-2014-call-lead
None of us live in the severe conditions like African Americans were living in the Southern United States. So it may be hard for us to relate, but we all have our blind spots. But if we think about it all churches have gotten used to being the church in a particular way and often don’t find it easy to change. Sometimes we need a minister or lay person to shake us up a bit to become open to becoming more relevant for our times.
In Canada we continue to struggle in our relationship with our First peoples. More and more First Nations see the value of nonviolent resistance to wake up the governments and the people to taking action that will begin to reduce the wide disparity between the rest of Canada and First Nation peoples. Is God calling us to walk with these people and do our part to heal the divisions between us and them? We are blessed to live in the midst of First Nations people and thus have a great opportunity to do this work/ministry of healing and justice.
We believe in a God who asks us to do the most unexpected things. We like Moses can find hundreds of excuses not to do things. But God never give ups on us until we say YES!
I would like to end with one of my favorite songs sung by Linnea Good, called “Who am I to say No”. I invite you to sit and reflect as you hear it. Please join in if you like.